Suburban Explorer

In the past 8 months, I haven't felt very inspired, personal style-wise.  With my body slowly becoming less "puffy" post-birth and having to expose my boobs every few hours easily, personal style took a back seat to practicality and laziness.  Back when we moved to Alaska I stored all the clothes that I knew I couldn't fit on my growing pregnant body, so my wardrobe was relatively limited, and when we packed all our stuff to move down here a couple months ago, my wardrobe got whittled down even further to what I could fit in a suitcase or two.  So this past week I did a bit of retail therapy, which helped on three fronts: getting out of the house, hanging out in an air-conditioned space, and adding a couple fresh pieces to my wardrobe.  

I feel like I'm kind of crystallizing a sense of what my style might be now.  I feel a little bit like a Free People meets Madewell type of girl.  With maybe a dash of rock + roll grunge thrown in there now and then.  We'll see how I feel about all the clothes I stored away over a year ago once I get them out upon our move back to Tacoma.  There may or may not be a shop-my-closet happening, depending on how many of the clothes I actually jive with these days!

Shop The Look

Mother's Day Session

I met up with my girl AlisaMarie at Anchorage's Mann Leiser Greenhouses a few weeks before Mother's Day to do a fun little shoot with my little man.  AlisaMarie also did our first family session back when Jack was only a couple months old. In our year living back in Alaska I didn't go out much and make a ton of friends, but AlisaMarie was one person I connected with and while I'm excited to head back to Tacoma, I'm also super bummed I couldn't pack her and her boys up and smuggle them down too.  If you're in Anchorage and need some photos hit up Sons and Daughters Photography, she'll do you right.

Motherhood is a strange and contradictory experience. One moment I'm laughing with Jack, the next I'm screaming with rage, the next I'm snuggled beside him, the next I'm bogged down with despair, and so on. I don't find fulfillment through motherhood, necessarily. I've sometimes wondered if I could "just" be a mom, If I didn't need to bring in an income, but I can't yet tell if I would go batshit crazy without having my own businesses and pursuits.  I know some women who thrive as mothers and find themselves in motherhood, but I feel more like the opposite-- that I've lost some of myself.  Some days it feels more like I've lost my mind, especially on days when I'm alone all 24 hours with Jack, with no other human interaction.  

But I'm learning, slowly, what I need to do to make motherhood work for me.  What systems I need in place so that I don't lose my mind, what things I need to weave into my life to hold on to my independent personhood, and most importantly when I need to ask (or beg) for help or reprieve.  It's a damn messy ordeal, sometimes I'm ashamed at how horribly I've coped with the change, but I also try to remember how much change and transition has happened (and continues to happen) over the past year and give myself grace.  

Tiered Dress : c/o Modcloth (a few years ago) | Flower Crowns : Mojave Moon | sheer dress : brought by AlisaMarie

Seven Months

Time is flying these days.  What with moving, and flying back and forth from Anchorage, and shooting weddings almost every weekend, it's been quite the month.  In the blink of an eye, Jack is one month older again!  This month has been wild in terms of his advancement and skills.  It's almost like he's changing on a weekly or even daily basis right now!  He's started pulling himself up to standing on literally everything, he's now crawling up on his hands and knees instead of his old army crawl, and he's getting better and better at sitting down from a stand instead of falling down, which was tres stressful.  He also got two bottom front teeth and saw his very first movie in theaters!  Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, good choice, bud.  

We are still living the transitionary life, staying with my parents in the basement of their new house in Oregon while we figure out how/when we can get back to living in Tacoma.  It's been really hard emotionally and logistically but I feel like there's going to be a light at the end of the tunnel here soon.  For now, our next exciting thing is seeing Dan again!  He left Anchorage today and is driving down the AlCan this week!  Hopefully, he'll be here sometime next week!  

5 Ways to wear a basic black tee

Lately, I've been trying to get my wardrobe more pared down and concise.  Just stuff that I love and mostly stuff that works well together.  Black jeans, a few cardigans that go well with nearly everything, simple and graphic tees, and a few statement pieces I can work in where needed.  A basic black tee is a staple and I loved creating these fun outfits around a super simple black t-shirt for my basic remix challenge!

Six Months

Two weeks ago this little human turned 6 months old.  Half a year.  His personality is definitely coming out and I'm slightly afraid that I may have created an extrovert.  He is the happiest baby I know (to be fair, I don't know a lot of babies, but also pretty much everyone who meets Jack says the same thing), and he's become pretty much unstoppable in terms of moving around.  He now pulls himself up to standing on anything he possibly can, he army crawls so fast it's frightening, and he's pretty much constantly exploring all the things.  He had his first trip to the Zoo last week, got to meet his dad's cousin and her kids, and has hung out with his aunt and uncles a few times now that we're in Oregon!  

I've been taking all Jack's monthly photos on this couch in our living room but I'm gonna have to find a new spot this month since we're on the road!  It's been kind of fun seeing how he's grown every month compared to the couch.  Month 7 will be an outlier, and hopefully by 8 months we'll have a living room of our own again?  Maybe?  Fingers crossed!