The Evening Glow

I think my favorite time of day is when the sun is low in the sky and everything has that golden glow.  Things just feel a bit more magical at that time of day.  I love sitting on the porch, drinking a beer with Dan, and decompressing.  So far we don't really have any plans for the 4th of July, but it's so fun to feel the festivity in the air.  Especially with the weather being so awesome today, everyone in Tacoma is high on life!  Maybe I'll make my traditional 4th of July cake... I haven't made one since living in Tacoma!  Shameful.  I guess last year I was living at Camp, though, so maybe that gets a free pass.  This year, no excuses!

poncho/courtesy of free people :: shorts/diy (from old PacSun jeans) :: shades/thrifted
shoes(on sale!)/courtesy of blowfish :: bag/courtesy of handbag heaven 

I was hoping that by July the weather would warm up and I wouldn't have to wear sweaters anymore (as I type this I'm laying in bed under a comforter wearing an enormous puffy jacket).  The weather forecast for the next week, though, is looking pretty damn summery!  I'm pretty excited to wear sundresses and sandals for days and days!  But for those cool Washington evenings and inevitable rainy days, this poncho is a pretty good middle ground.  It still feels like a summery piece, but provides enough warmth for when the temperature drops after the sun sets.  Plus, it's super comfy.  I've been wearing it for like three days in a row.  A cute alternative to throwing on a sweatshirt!

Lulu's + DT // Austin Hipster

The Brave and I pulled into Austin, Texas right before Thanksgiving. It was about 85 degrees (child's play to all of you in the South, I know) and I'm pretty sure I almost passed out from heat stroke as I was pulling into the parking lot of Epoch Coffee. I was meeting a journalist there to do an interview for VenusZine (which ended up never being published). I remember laying in the Winne feeling woozy and trying to feel normal before I had to be fully conscious for the interview. I'm pretty sure my body was like, "Hey! It's November... there's supposed to be like 3 ft of snow on the ground!" But anyway, I started feeling better after a bit and went into Epoch to order something cold and refreshing. I really loved the vibe that Epoch had, and being an Alaskan/Northwest gal I was happy to sip on some delicious coffee. At that point I had already been thinking about opening a coffee shop someday, so it was more inspiration to file away. It was pleasant to find myself in somewhere with that familiar Northwest-hipster-coffee-house vibe, after being in the deep south for a while. A little taste of familiar territory. Right next door to Epoch Coffee is Blue Velvet, which is an awesome little vintage shop. It was funny running across a vintage shop called "Blue Velvet" because I'd just been to Elsie's shop Red Velvet!

Southern Hospitality Polka Dot Dress  + Very Volatile Rio Grande Boots + 
Billabong Nova Denim Jacket/courtesy of Lulu*s :: necklace/handmade :: watch/UO

bag/courtesy of handbag heaven :: bracelets/jewelmint :: photos of me by Dan

Here in Tacoma, one of my favorite coffee shops is Bluebeard Coffee Roasters. After BBC closed I was out of both a job and my favorite coffee shop. Luckily Bluebeard opened shortly after (and my favorite coworker started working there after BBC closed!). The roast all their own beans, and their coffee is delicious. Fun fact: I actually wanted to have my wedding/reception at Bluebeard! But we decided it'd probably be too small of a venue and it's right on 6th Ave so parking for guests would've been a nightmare. We ended up giving all our wedding guests each a little 1/2 lb of Bluebeard coffee beans as favors, though. We figured it'd be a fun way to give people a little taste of our town/the Northwest. Since we frequented coffee shops almost daily while we were dating (and still do), it was also a bit of our dating history in a way.

One of my favorite summer drinks is an iced americano with some almond syrup. It's cold and has delicious coffee in it, but it also has that sweet kick of almond syrup. I have a strong affinity for almond syrup. Back in the 90's when I was a kid, my dad bought a La Pavoni espresso machine and would make cappuccinos and such at home. I thought my parents were super cool and wanted to be just like them, so I did silly things like made a replica of the La Pavoni machine... out of printer paper. Yeah, just white printer paper. I don't know. But anyway, my dad would make me steamers and put almond syrup in them. So delicious. To this day I'll still get almond steamers and it tastes like pure nostalgia.

Check out my other posts in this series here and here!

Pretty Flowers in Vases, Enraptured

I want to thank everyone who commented on my post last week. It was so wonderful to hear the stories and experiences of so many women. It's nice to hear so many female voices (well, virtual voices) in resistance to the message we're fed by the media that we need to look a certain way and that we must seek to embody their definition of perfect. One of my favorite documentaries, Killing Us Softly, by Jean Kilbourne, is an incredible study on how advertising influences our self-image. I find myself watching it every couple months, to remind myself of how pervasive the message is in advertising that women are supposed to look "flawless," innocent yet sexual, helpless, and un-intimidating, how women's bodies are objectified and violence towards women is trivialized. It's crazy how much we just take advertising in and don't realize how it's affecting our view of other women and ourselves. Once you start noticing it, though, it's amazing how pervasive it is!

dress + hat/courtesy of modcloth :: shoes/courtesy of seychelles

This dress was designed by the founder of ModCloth, Susan Gregg Koger, for their "Make the Cut" collection. Tons of people submitted designs for the collection, which were then narrowed down to just a few designs which got produced. Susan threw in a couple of her own designs for the collection, which are lovely. This dress is very "Betty Draper," with the nipped waist and full skirt. It's always fun to see people I admire come out with clothing designs of their own. Vanessa, Elsie, Abi, and so many more lovely blogger gals I admire, have all created beautiful, fun and handmade collections of vintage-inspired clothes. It's cool to see so many creative people out there feeling empowered and inspired to create handmade things.

Photographer Crush // Parker Fitzgerald

I first discovered the work of Parker Fitzgerald after seeing his photos of Chelsea, who I'd met up with on the Brave trip. Just recently he took some photos of another lovely blogger who, incidentally, I also met up with on my trip! The beautiful Vanessa from The Velvet Bird. I visited Vanessa in Georgia, but she's just moved to Portland! I keep meaning to make it down there to visit her, as well as the many other bloggers and friends who call Portland home. Hopefully I get down there before summer ends. But I digress. Parker creates incredibly beautiful photographs. His portraits are some of the most arresting I've ever seen, and it's refreshing to see a great photographer with a love for film, when most of the photography world is abandoning film for digital. I think his polaroids are my favorite. I've got a Polaroid Land camera that I've made feeble attempts at getting to work, but so far no luck. I always tell myself I'm going to start using film more, as I've got quite a few film cameras, but I never remember. I think I'll add "take film photos" to my summer goal list. I digress again. Take a looksie at these beauties and then head over to his website, blog, or flickr to see more!

Embrace Your Inner Pin-Up

I think Amy and I have been operating on the same brain wavelength lately because girlfriend just keeps posting stuff that echoes the thoughts that are running around my brain. Last week she did a series all about loving your body and embracing yourself, which obviously= awesome. To some degree, I've felt that I don't have a place in a discussion about body acceptance. I've never had an eating disorder, I have a pretty regular body in that I'm neither under nor over weight, I've never felt a lot of pressure to look differently or have a different body (other than wanting bigger boobs when I was in junior high and high school), and I have never hated my body. I don't have a moving story about how I overcame an eating disorder or lost a ton of weight. But, at the same time, I feel so passionately about encouraging other women to love their bodies and selves. So I'm going to add my two cents to Amy's awesome series. And I'm going to be long-winded (sorry!).

There are a lot of things I've encountered lately that have been contributing to my thoughts on accepting yourself and embracing your own beauty (besides Amy's series). Most recently I saw a comment on a youtube trailer for the new movie "Brave" that said, "Finally, A Disney princess without perfect hair." Perfect. That word has been on my mind frequently these days. I hear a lot of talk about perfect. The perfect skin, the perfect body, the perfect hair. I hear a lot of girls say, "I'm not perfect, but, you know, I'm happy with my body." I'm kind of done with that kind of thinking. The Disney princess in Brave DOES have perfect hair. It's wild and free and vibrant and gorgeous! How is that not perfect?

swimsuit/courtesy of modcloth (shortest outfit details ever)

I have cellulite on my thighs, my skin isn't taut and tan, and I have ruddy cheeks. How is that not perfect? Who is to say what perfection is? Who is this mystery person, this mystery committee, who has determined that a certain body, skin, and hair is "perfect" and the best the rest of us can do is say, "well, I know I'm not perfect, but I'm happy with my body." I understand that this culturally influenced concept of perfect is constantly changing with the times. Culturally, "perfect" looked much different to people in the 16th century, and "perfect" looks much different in other cultures around the globe. I want to stop thinking about perfect being something that is dictated by culture, though. I want to take back the word perfect and own it.

Somewhere along the lines, in this culture, "perfect" has come to mean manicured and "flawless." Every. Single. Photograph in fashion magazines is photoshopped within an inch of it's life. Human bodies are stripped of their pores, their freckles, their bulges and wrinkles. And we've come to accept that this is perfection. That removing every sign of life, every wrinkle we've acquired from laughing with friends late into the night, every slightly yellowed tooth from too many cups of coffee while reading our favorite book, every freckle from days spent in the sun, every bulge from enjoying delicious food... is what perfection looks like.

I want to look everyone in the eye and tell them that they. are. perfect. Cellulite is perfect. Thunder thighs are perfect. Crazy curly hair is perfect. Small breasts are perfect. To me, those are things that society's version of perfect would tell me are flaws for my body, but replace those with things you see as flaws on your body! What are the things that you look in the mirror and sneer at? Reject the voices that tell you that those are imperfections. Replace those voices with ones that tell you how beautiful those "flaws" are.

I am healthy and active (most of the time). I am happy. I am loved. Is that not perfection? No, I'm supposed to hate my body, the one I get to spend my whole life experiencing the world through, instead. I refuse that. I'm not going to hate my body because I have big thighs and cellulite, or a belly pooch that won't go away no matter how many crunches I do, or because my arms are thicker and shorter than the arms models have, or because my hair is huge and unruly. And you shouldn't hate your body because it's skinny, or lumpy, or concave, or convex, or because you have big boobs, or because you barely have any boobs, or because your skin has a condition, or because you're hairy, or because you have thin hair, or because you have dark skin, or because you aren't tan, etc. etc. You are perfect and valuable because you are a human life. And what a shame it would be to spend your entire life hating the one body you have. The body through which all experiences are filtered in this world.

I love this little clip of Eve Ensler. I think she communicates much more succinctly what I've been babbling on about for many paragraphs...

Once we get rid of this notion that perfection is a mold that each of us, with our infinite differences, must try to squeeze into, it's easy to see that perfection is totally and completely individual. I am perfect. You are perfect. If you're a magazine model, you are perfect. If you're a size 16, you are perfect. If you've had a limb amputated, you're perfect. If you have Down's Syndrome, you are perfect. If you're Cinderella, you're perfect. If you're Merida, you're perfect. We are all composed of "imperfections" and instead of counting our flaws in the mirror, we should take back ownership of the word "perfection". Own it. You own perfection. Perfection doesn't own you. You may think it's easier for women who do fit the current beauty ideal to love their bodies, but I guarantee that every woman has felt the sting of the word "perfect," and we can't go around saying, "well, it must be easy for you to love your body."

I realize that the issue of body size and body acceptance is a complex one. There are many discussions about health and weight going on which are related to body acceptance. I'm all for health and changing your body in the interest of becoming more healthy. I know Tieka has shared her experience with losing a lot of weight after starting to live a healthier lifestyle, which is great. If someone wants to change their body because they hate it, I suppose that's your prerogative, but I wish people would want to become healthier because they love their body instead. And if healthy ends up looking different than the image you had in your mind, that should be okay.

Today I'm taking Amy literally and embracing my inner pin-up. Well, with these photos, I guess I'm letting my inner pin-up out for the day. It's a bit awkward and extremely vulnerable to post bikini photos on the internet, but here I am. You might think I'm too skinny, too fat, or "perfect" but I don't care what you think, because frankly what you think doesn't matter (and if you feel like leaving a comment letting me know that you think I'm too fat or skinny, I'm much obliged to delete that shit). I'm loving the body I have and I'm owning perfect.

As a disclaimer, I realize that the discussion about body image, society, and beauty is a hot button issue. Everyone seems to feel pretty strongly about this topic (quite literally, we women have a lot of skin in the game, and things get personal pretty fast) and sometimes the discussion can devolve into bashing one another with hurtful words. If you'd like to contribute to this discussion in the comments, feel free to do so! I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic, but please remember to be respectful.

*My intensedebate commenting seems to have gone down, so blogger comments have taken over. If you've written a comment before w/ the intensedebate commenting, don't worry! It's still there and I can read them, they just won't show up on my blog.*